Matt's Musings

Welcome to my message page!

Assertiveness is Respecting Yourself without Judging Others

It's hard to stand up for yourself without attacking others.

It's especially important in volatile situations and uncertain times, to be able to speak assertively. I see assertiveness as the middle of two polar opposites. On one end is the person who takes care of everyone else at their own expense. I call them the willing victim (martyr). On the other end is the person that takes care of themselves at everyone else's expense (bully). We all have been on both ends of this spectrum at times.

Assertiveness gives you the best chance of getting what you want - change from others.

When others feel blamed, judged, criticized or attacked they only see four defense options:

  1. Denial
  2. Rationalization (all their reasons why)
  3. Attacking you (everyone knows the best defense is a strong offense)
  4. Shutting down or fleeing 

You might notice none of those options help you and are unlikely to elicit change.

I teach clients this powerful communication tool and help them apply it to real word challenges.

Here is more info from the Mayo clinic about assertiveness

Contact Me

We look forward to hearing from you

Office Hours



8:00 am-9:00 pm


8:00 am-9:00 pm




8:00 am-6:00 pm


8:00 am-5:00 pm